MBFWM 06

Chapter 6

Perhaps because his eyes were closed, Lee Jin found herself repeatedly examining his features.

She had always known he was handsome, but this was the first time she had openly stared at his face like this.

Realizing how absentmindedly she had been staring at him, Lee Jin hurriedly spoke.

“How could I do that? Never mind.”

She couldn’t bring herself to smear clay across that sculpted, statue-like face.

Lee Jin shook her head, unable to do it.

“Why? Do you think an opportunity like this comes around often?”

Kang Hyun spoke while narrowing one eye slightly.

Perhaps he meant that she still had a chance, but even the way he narrowed one eye had its own charm.

Lee Jin’s fingertips twitched involuntarily.

For some reason, she imagined what would happen if she grabbed his cheek with her clay-covered hand, and that thought made her feel awkward.

If she had been the sort of person who did whatever she pleased, she probably wouldn’t have hesitated to touch his face.

But Lee Jin was cautious by nature, and excessive politeness had become deeply ingrained in her.

“There’s no need for us both to get dirty.”

When Lee Jin refused to do as he wished, Kang Hyun clicked his tongue inwardly.

I still have a long, long way to go.

“I was planning to declare war on you the moment you touched my face.”

He smiled regretfully.

“Do you still think I’m a kid?”

Remembering a day in the past when the three of them—including Hwan—had spent the entire day fooling around together, Lee Jin smiled innocently.

If I still treated you like a child, we wouldn’t be here like this.

Kang Hyun looked at Lee Jin with a slightly crooked gaze before speaking.

“Why don’t we stop by Cheongjukje later? I want to show you what it looks like at night. It’s completely different from the daytime, so seeing it might help you later when you’re making the pottery.”

“Sure. We can finish this, clean up, and then go.”

After stopping by a restaurant they frequently visited for dinner, the two headed to Cheongjukje.

Streetlights illuminated the surroundings, their warm glow blending beautifully with the wooden pillars characteristic of the hanok.

“Wow, it’s beautiful. The atmosphere is completely different at night.”

Lee Jin looked around with a slightly excited expression.

“Want to take a walk together?”

Kang Hyun led her toward the walking path that stretched toward the bamboo grove.

When the wind blew, the bamboo rising as though it could reach the edge of the sky collided against one another, producing a soft whooshhh.

The sound stirred something emotional inside her.

“Why are you coming home so late?”

“You came home even later yesterday, oppa.”

“You and I aren’t the same. You’re pretty, so you should never be wandering around at night.”

It seemed as though she could hear Hwan’s voice mixed with the rustling of the bamboo leaves, saying those embarrassingly affectionate things without hesitation.

“Jin, you miss Hwan, don’t you?”

Kang Hyun’s voice suddenly pierced her ears.

Lee Jin abruptly stopped walking and turned toward him.

The wind blew again, and the bamboo leaves rustled loudly once more.

“I miss him a lot.”

Kang Hyun spoke honestly.

“I can’t tell you how much I regret not seeing him more often. If I’d known he was going to leave us like that, I would’ve made more time to see him.”

Lee Jin’s eyes wavered briefly.

She hadn’t expected Kang Hyun to reveal his true feelings so honestly.

Unable to cope with the sudden wave of longing that overwhelmed her, she squeezed her eyes shut.

Her throat felt blocked, and her voice wouldn’t come out properly.

Eventually, Lee Jin forced the words out.

“I’m the same. Even now, whenever my phone rings, I still get startled. Even though I know oppa can’t call me anymore.”

She couldn’t talk about things like this with just anyone.

Because Kang Hyun had known Hwan so well, she felt able to open her heart to him.

“Either way, forgetting him is completely impossible. So let’s take it slowly. That’s okay.”

Strangely, those words brought her a great deal of comfort.

And because of them, Lee Jin realized that she had unconsciously been pushing herself, telling herself that she couldn’t allow herself to become consumed by her grief.

“Thank you. Those words really comforted me.”

Lee Jin smiled, genuinely grateful to Kang Hyun.

She didn’t realize how heartbreaking that smile looked.

What greeted Lee Jin when she arrived home was darkness.

The entire house was submerged in darkness, without a single light turned on.

“Ugh… sob….”

The sound of crying seeped through the crack beneath a bedroom door, and Lee Jin’s face stiffened.

Mom again…

For a brief moment, Lee Jin agonized over what to do.

Should she open the bedroom door, go inside, and tell her mother to stop crying?

Or should she simply pretend she hadn’t heard anything?

Perhaps because she had just been talking about Hwan with Kang Hyun, her mother’s grief felt even more painful.

Lee Jin understood that her mother had every right to grieve, but it hurt even more to realize that, in her mother’s eyes, she seemed to be completely invisible.

Yesterday and today, her mother had only Hwan on her mind.

It felt like proof that tomorrow and the day after would be the same.

Lee Jin’s heart crumbled.

Does Mom really consider me her daughter?

If she did, how could she have never once worried about her?

Her mother had been so consumed by the grief of losing Hwan that she couldn’t bring herself to care about what her daughter was doing, what she was eating, or what she was thinking.

She really hadn’t cared about anything.

And today, that fact hurt more than ever.

She knew she was supposed to understand her mother’s pain.

She was supposed to think, She must be suffering terribly to be like this.

But she couldn’t.

Lee Jin stood motionless in the dark living room and steadied her breathing.

She wasn’t crying yet, but a sharp pain squeezed her heart, making it difficult to breathe.

“Hwan is the man of this household, so you have to accommodate him.”

“You should just endure it.”

Her mother’s words, words she had heard countless times, seemed to echo in her ears like tinnitus.

Nothing about them should have felt new because her mother had always been like that.

And yet, the words from the past had become invisible thorns, stabbing into her.

Even though Hwan is gone, nothing has changed.

Why? Why? How long is this going to continue?

Even as she resigned herself to it, a part of her still couldn’t accept it.

Her thoughts became hopelessly tangled.

Lee Jin began gasping for breath as though someone were strangling her.

Before she realized what she was doing, she opened Go Myung-sook’s bedroom door.

Creeeeak—

The old hinges emitted an unpleasant groan.

“Mom…”

Hearing Lee Jin’s voice, Go Myung-sook raised her head.

Then she crawled almost on all fours toward the doorway and grabbed Lee Jin by the ankle.

“Our Hwan… Our Hwan wasn’t someone who was supposed to die. Right? Hmm? We must have gotten something wrong, didn’t we?”

Seeing her mother’s face drenched in tears, something inside Lee Jin’s mind snapped weakly.

“Mom, oppa is dead. We can’t ever see him again. Oppa isn’t coming back to this house.”

She forced out the words she had avoided saying all this time.

Her emotions surged, and her eyes quickly began to burn with tears.

Lee Jin let out a sound like an animal in pain and repeated herself.

“Oppa is gone now. We’re never going to see him again!”

“No. No…”

Go Myung-sook frantically shook her head, refusing to accept it.

Watching her, tears suddenly streamed down Lee Jin’s face.

“What am I to you, Mom? Am I really your daughter?”

Go Myung-sook stared at her blankly.

“What…?”

“Your daughter is still alive. But in your eyes, you can’t see your living daughter. All you can see is my dead brother!”

Go Myung-sook was confused.

She couldn’t understand what Lee Jin was saying.

Lee Jin had always been an obedient daughter.

She had always thought of her as a considerate and caring child.

This was the first time she had ever seen Lee Jin raise her voice like this.

“If I died, would you cry like this for me?”

The words slipped from Lee Jin’s lips almost as though she were speaking to herself.

Go Myung-sook’s heart dropped.

“What? You… How could you say something like that?”

Her scolding tone made Lee Jin’s expression twist with even more pain.

“Why? You don’t even listen to what I say.”

Go Myung-sook should have asked, When did I ever not listen to you?

But she couldn’t remember.

No matter how deeply she searched her memories, she couldn’t recall a single time when she had truly listened to her daughter.

The answer was already visible in Go Myung-sook’s unfocused, trembling eyes.

Lee Jin hadn’t expected to receive comfort or some convincing excuse from her.

She let out a long breath and tried to calm her agitated emotions.

“Go to sleep. Don’t worry about me.”

She told her mother not to worry about her, but deep down, she was terrified that Go Myung-sook might actually say that she wouldn’t.

Lee Jin didn’t wait for her answer.

She fled the house.

Go Myung-sook sat there in a daze, staring blankly at the sensor light in the entrance.

When the light eventually turned off and darkness swallowed the house again, her shoulders slumped helplessly.

After leaving the house, Lee Jin walked aimlessly.

She clenched her teeth tightly, trying not to cry, but sobs kept escaping.

Just as she struggled to swallow the sounds that escaped like painful moans, her phone began to vibrate.

Could it be…? Maybe Mom?

With the faintest glimmer of hope, she pulled out her phone.

But, as expected, it wasn’t her mother.

Seeing the name of Moon Kang Hyun—the person she had somehow come to rely on more than her own family—Lee Jin paused to steady her breathing before pressing the call button.

[Did you get home safely?]

The moment she heard his voice, the tears that had stopped suddenly burst forth.

“Yeah. I got home safely.”

She tried to answer casually, but her voice came out terribly broken.

[Seo Lee Jin, where are you?]

And Kang Hyun immediately noticed.