EBCGM 01

Chapter 01 …

If You Can’t Avoid It, Enjoy It

It all started right after I returned to Korea, fresh off finishing my studies in the States.

Back then, if I wanted to party, I went out and partied. If I wanted to travel, I packed my bags. If I had a craving for a specific food—no matter what it was—I went straight out and got it. Truly, those were days when I lacked absolutely nothing.

That sweet life didn’t last long, though.

“Dad, you wanted to see me—”

It was early one morning when my father summoned me. He took a slow sip of his tea, stared straight into my eyes, and spoke.

“I think the time has come.”

“Time for what?”

“Go serve in the military.”

For a second, I thought my ears were playing tricks on me. The military? Out of nowhere?

“Dad, your sense of humor is really improving.”

“Do I look like I called you here to crack jokes?”

“Wait, you’re actually serious?”

“Your grandfather, our founder, picked up a rifle during the Korean War. I served as an officer myself. So it’s only right that you go, too. Given your age, though, it’s best you go as an enlisted soldier.”

“Hold on, Dad—”

Realizing he wasn’t joking, I chugged the tea in front of me to clear my head. Other rich kids were bending over backward just to pull strings and dodge the draft. My dad had more than enough power to get me out of it, too. So why on earth was he suddenly telling me to enlist?

“As you know better than anyone, I hold dual citizenship with the U.S.—”

“I’ve made up my mind.”

“Dad, did I do something terribly wrong?”

“Haven’t I told you this before? My father, our late founder, emphasized it over and over: every real South Korean man must serve his time in the military. That’s why I went without raising a single complaint—”

“I know that, but still—”

“Why do you think our company enjoys such a positive public image?”

“…Well, that’s…”

“Setting your older brother aside—he’s been sickly since birth, so he couldn’t serve even if he wanted to, which is out of his control.”

I had an older brother and a younger sibling. My brother was born with a severe heart condition, enduring countless surgeries and basically growing up in hospitals.

“If you don’t complete your military service, I have zero intention of handing anything over to you. Especially when it comes to running the company—”

“Sounds like I don’t really have a choice here.”

“Well, there’s a saying: if you can’t avoid it, enjoy it.”

Even though I knew what he was getting at, I couldn’t stop my head from spinning.

“If you go in as an enlisted soldier, you’ll start as a trainee and work your way up from the very bottom as a Private Second Class. You need that kind of experience. And make no mistake: you won’t get a single drop of special treatment while you’re in there.”

“Dad—”

“That’s all. You’re dismissed. I have a packed schedule this morning.”

I opened my mouth to argue further, but closed it just as fast. I knew nothing I said was going to change the fact that I was going to the military.

January 2007.

Sure enough, I found myself standing outside the recruit training center.

“Did my parents really not come…?”

“Yes, sir.”

I kind of saw it coming. If my parents—whose faces were plastered all over the news—showed up, all eyes would instantly be glued to me.

“It’s time to head in, sir.”

“Sigh…”

“Ah, and while you’re serving, you must only contact me directly. Except, of course, when you’re out on leave.”

“What kind of rule is—”

“This is also the Chairman’s direct order.”

While other families were wiping away tears as they watched their sons walk through the gates, the only person by my side was Secretary Park, looking as stone-faced as ever.

“Draftees! It’s time to assemble…!”

Fine. If it’s come to this, let’s just do it. It’s not like it’s gonna kill me, right?

“Please stay safe and take care of yourself, sir.”

Secretary Park gave a deep, formal bow and walked away without looking back once.

“Stand straight—”

The drill instructors were barking orders to control the incoming crowd. One instructor, who looked exceptionally cranky for no apparent reason, glared right at me. Not wanting to draw any attention on day one, I quickly averted my eyes.

Dum-dum, dum-dum-dum—!

Nonsan Training Center.

Life at the boot camp was nothing short of absolute hell.

Just a few days ago, I was waking up at the exact time I used to stumble home after a night out.

“What are you dragging your feet for?! Get the hell up right now, you bastards!”

On top of that, I was forced to eat military slop for the first time in my life. At first, the bland, unseasoned food made my stomach turn. But after surviving hours of grueling physical training every day, I caught myself scraping every last grain of rice off my tray, just like all the other recruits. We inhaled our meals like we were in a high-stakes competitive eating contest.

“Anyone got leftovers?!”

“No, Drill Instructor!”

“On your feet!”

Boot camp was boot camp. Getting cursed out by instructors and red-hatted drill officers was standard routine. We were rushed around so relentlessly that we barely had a second to breathe.

“Hey, Trainee 24! Don’t you see your entire squad suffering right now because of you?!”

“…Drill Instructor, my… my legs won’t move. I can’t breathe…”

“Look at this bastard faking an illness already! Huh?!”

Just being in training camp opened my eyes. How on earth did a kid like this even pass the military physical? He was so frail, and there were a few others who clearly had mental health struggles, too.

“Excuse me, Drill Instructor.”

“Trainee 25! What the hell do you want?!”

“If it’s alright, can I carry Trainee 24’s gear for him?”

“…What? Why would you carry his stuff?!”

“From what I can see, he genuinely looks like he’s in terrible shape.”

Maybe he was faking it like the instructor said. But seeing how pale his face had turned, I couldn’t just turn a blind eye. After all, he was the guy sleeping right next to me every night. Instead of just talking, I stepped in and grabbed his heavy pack.

“Hey, 24. Please, man, can we just get through today without any drama? Fuck…”

“…I’m sorry.”

“I’m sick of hearing ‘sorry’! Just hang the fuck in there, or get yourself discharged!”

Did I feel for him because he reminded me of my sickly older brother? I really wanted to help him out however I could. So whenever the other recruits openly laid into 24, I stepped in to smooth things over.

“You all just watched the drill instructors demonstrate! Now execute the training exactly as shown!”

Eventually, the day arrived for the one drill every single recruit dreads.

“…Fuck me, it feels like we’re being dragged into a concentration camp.”

“Hey, shut up.”

A completely sealed chamber. The site for the infamous Chemical, Biological, and Radiological (CBR) gas training.

“Swap gas filter canisters—!”

“…Cough! Hack!”

“Trainee 24! What the hell are you doing?! Hold it in!”

“He-Help me…!”

The moment the exercise started, Trainee 24—who turned out to have severe asthma—looked like he was literally dying.

Granted, I was dying, too. It felt like someone was throwing crushed glass straight into my face. Tears and snot were pouring out uncontrollably. Even so, I stood my ground without flinching, gritting my teeth through the pain.

“I-I can’t take it anymore…!”

“Look at this crazy bastard! Did he just shove a drill instructor out of the way?!”

In a desperate, panicked bid to survive… Trainee 24 slammed open the sealed door and bolted outside.

“Because of Trainee 24, we’re doing the drill over—!”

“Drill Instructor.”

“What now?!”

“Sorry to interrupt, but I heard Trainee 24 has asthma. His condition reportedly improved before enlisting, which is how he got passed for active duty. But as you know, putting an asthmatic through CBR training—”

“Shut it! He passed the physical, so he’s fit to serve!”

“I think there’s reasonable doubt here. He needs a medical re-evaluation.”

“You arrogant little shit! What, are you saying you’ll take his spot and do the gas chamber again for him?! Huh?!”

“If that’s what it takes—”

“What?!”

“I’ll go back in and take the hit for him.”

“Where the hell did this guy come from?!”

Outside the gas chamber, the poor guy was suffering far worse than anyone else. After checking on him, the instructor reported the situation to the head commander. Trainee 24 was rushed to the military hospital… and after a thorough re-examination, he was officially deemed unfit for active service.

On graduation day at the training center, Secretary Park was once again the only one there to greet me.

“Is there anything specific you’d like to eat, sir?”

“My parents didn’t show up this time either, huh? Well, makes sense.”

“You went through a lot during basic training.”

“Everyone goes through it. Anyway, like you said before… now that boot camp is over, things get a bit easier once I hit my assigned unit, right?”

Secretary Park just cleared his throat a few times without answering directly.

“Are you sure there’s nothing you want to eat?”

“Honestly, I’d love a drink, but since I have to head back, that’s out of the question.”

“Understood.”

“Though, the instructor mentioned I’m being sent to Sangmudae down in Jangseong—”

“That would be your advanced branch training, sir.”

“Advanced training…?”

“If it’s Sangmudae, my guess is you’ll be assigned as an armored tank crewman—”

“I never even applied for armor… Tank crewman…?”

Just as Secretary Park and I were wrapping up our brief conversation and heading off to grab a bite, someone shouted.

“Bro!”

“…?”

“You didn’t forget about me already, did you?!”

“Why are you here—”

“Thanks to you, man, I… sniff!”

The guy who claimed I saved him from a major life crisis—Trainee 24—had grown out his hair a bit and come all the way to find me.

“Why are you crying? I just did what anyone should’ve done. Besides, this place isn’t close. Why’d you come all this way?”

“I just really wanted to thank you in person.”

“Honestly, it’s pretty impressive you found me in a crowd this big.”

“…Are you doing okay, bro?”

“Yeah, as you can see, I’m completely fine.”

“That’s such a relief. Seriously, man.”

“I’m glad to see you looking way healthier than before, too. Since you came all this way, let’s grab food together.”

“It’s on me, bro!”

“Haha, you’re paying?”

“Yeah, anything! Whatever you want to eat!”

“Alright, let’s move.”

Secretary Park wasn’t the type to say a word more than necessary. Seeing the kid drop out of nowhere crying his eyes out in gratitude, he quietly gave us space to catch up.

Of course, I didn’t actually let the kid pay for dinner.

Either way, after finishing basic training, I had to power through advanced training at Sangmudae.

“…I feel like something’s horribly wrong here.”

“What did you just say—”

“I expected driving a tank to be different, but I didn’t think it’d be this wildly different from driving regular cars.”

“Keep your eyes forward and focus!”

I’d driven my fair share of high-end cars back in Korea and the States, but driving a armored tank was a first. After wrapping up advanced training at Sangmudae—which was relatively less grueling than boot camp—the big day finally arrived: official unit assignment.

I was shipped off to a tank battalion under a mechanized infantry division in Yeongcheon, Gyeonggi Province, sporting a single private stripe on my chest.

“What’s this, a new recruit?”

I was well aware that the military was a strict hierarchy; I’d spent weeks learning that through boot camp and Sangmudae. Still, Secretary Park’s words echoed in my mind—that things would get easier once I reached my actual unit.

“Yes.”

“‘Yes’? ‘Yes-s’?”

“Pri-vate! Han Taepyeong!”

The guys in the barracks all stared at my face with expressions that screamed, Where the hell did this weirdo come from?

Even so, I tried to keep my composure. But before I could say another word—

“Hey, somebody take the new guy to do laundry, then take him to the shower room. Newbie or not, I can’t stand looking at a filthy recruit.”

“Yes, Sergeant!”

Following the Sergeant’s orders, I was escorted to the company shower room by a few senior soldiers.

“Holy shit… Hey, new guy.”

“Pri-vate! Han—!”

“…What the hell are you packing?”

“Pardon?”

“Is this guy a horse?! No, wait, is that an elephant?!”

All the seniors washing up around me suddenly locked their eyes onto one specific part of my body.

“Are you fucking kidding me?! I’m so jealous!”

“…Man, you don’t even need to prepare a talent show for the new recruit orientation.”

“Holy shit, isn’t that heavy to carry around?! Damn, that size is…”

At first, I had no clue what they were talking about. But it didn’t take long to realize what their comments meant. Pretending I hadn’t heard a thing, I just quietly kept scrubbing myself down.

“A big shot… no, a huge unit just walked into our platoon.”

“You mean literally huge, right Corporal?”

“Spread the word to the other squads—our company just landed a total monster!”